Sharing Responsibilities as New Parents

The Wife   Sep 28, 2020

Nicole turned the alarm off before it wakes her one year old, who just needs an excuse to cry. With sleepy eyes, she looked at the time, it was 10 past 6, she scoffed and put the pillow on her head so that it covers her eyes and went back to sleep again. She woke up startled and almost screamed at the clock, it was quarter to 7. "Oh no, oh no", she muttered to herself, "I am late.....AGAIN". She had a Zoom meeting at 7:00 AM with the Client, but before that she had to freshen up and look smart and fresh for the meeting.

She sent a text to her boss that she will be joining the meeting in 5 mins and rushed to the bathroom. She was glad when the meeting got over, but all this hush hush made her very dizzy and she craved for some coffee. She slowly walked out of the home office, peeped into the baby's room, felt happy to see the baby sleeping peacefully, then checked the bedroom and the great Husband was sleeping as well. She sighed "Lucky Rascal."

She made some coffee and put a couple of bread slices in the toaster for herself. Smelling the awesome Coffee, she was about to take a bite when she heard the baby crying. As she was trying to calm the baby, her coffee and toast sat untouched on the breakfast table. It was almost noon, Nicole went back and forth with her office work and looking after the baby in a 3 part cycle of feeding, sleeping and changing diapers. These are the days when the baby does not like wet diapers at all and the demand to change the diapers increases.

In the middle of finishing an email, she saw Jason standing behind her who immediately gave her a light hug, and uttered the first sentence of the day, noooooo, not I love you, but, "Can I have some coffee please?", and he left before she could answer, assuming that she will definitely get the coffee (What do u think she should do?). Half an hour later Nicole went in to the kitchen, got a hot cup of coffee for Jason, who was watching news on T.V. about the novel Corona virus.

"Hey, let's watch some T.V program together", Jason said to Nicole with some shine and love in his eyes. Nicole looked at the time and analyzed her pending work in her brain to check if she can spare few minutes. She smiled at Jason and answered, "Why not?", and got herself some coffee as well while feeling the increase in her anxiety levels thinking about the report she needs to finish. They watched their favorite T.V series together for 10 mins and their peaceful together time was disturbed by their crying baby.

Nicole thought Jason would take over and will rush into the baby's room, but instead he said "This baby sure does know how to grab attention. I will pause the show for you dear". Nicole looked at Jason surprisingly, trying to digest the situation. He looked back at her and said "What? Oh, do you want me to handle this? I can do that". "No need, you can watch your T.V all day, I am here for your service", Nicole snapped and left the room. She came back with the baby, who is calm and playful as if nothing had happened. After placing the baby in a play pen she went in the kitchen to get some formula for the baby.

Jason realized that he messed up, quickly ran behind her and while holding her hand with a gentle twist and turn tried to hug her, but she pushed him away, "Please don't bother me, unlike you I have millions of things to do", Nicole said in a rude and stern voice. "What do you mean by that", said Jason with a surprised tone. He was taken aback by Nicole’s sudden outburst. "You think I enjoy staying all day at home, but the circumstances are not in my hand. I am just another employee in a coffee shop. If everything is closed then I have no option but to stay at home", he continued. "Yes, you don't have an option with that but at least you can pitch in and offer some help around the house", Nicole said with a slight anger and anguish in her tone. Their voices are rising and their anger reaching the boiling point. They tried to prove their point with their own justifications and accusations.

In this battle of war of the words and in the flames of overpowering anger, they ignored their baby who was crying loudly. They spent the rest of the day ignoring each other. They lost their precious time together as a family.

As Gautam Buddha said: "No matter what the situations are, if you surrender yourself to anger, the anger will always take your life away from you"? Nicole and Jason lost their whole day and they couldn't make any new memories to cherish of that day.

There are lots of changes both the partners could have done, for example:
Nicole could have asked Jason to help instead of expecting it?
Jason should understand his responsibility as a husband and a father and should also consider that his wife is a working mother as well, and above all, both are new parents.
Both partners should avoid using insulting words while in an argument and should try to avoid this in front of that cute little baby who is figuring out how to get hold of that delicious looking T.V remote control.

Thank you for reading this blog.
Please share your thoughts.....

Disclaimer :"All characters in the story are fictitious, any resemblance to any living or dead individual is a coincidence.”